Stability..

4:40 pm it was.The girl looked in her cellphone,still deciding should she wait or be on her way back to her home(yeah,exam time coming,every minute is precious out here!).In the midst of all this thought process she ceased herself from walking in one of those green buses standing in front of her,thinking maybe next time.Mind you,she even missed the second one..ha ha!

4.55 it was..again she checked her cellphone(this was the thirteenth or fifteenth time she did this,annoying all those sitting beside her at the bus stand though she hardly cared).But she didn't get any reply.She knew it wasn't her style,no not at all.Still,tried to make things fall perfectly.

In the end she understood that maybe it was herself getting so annoyed because of her bad performance in her exams.Again,thinking that she has been frustrated for a while.

But due to some exchange of words between both of them which increased the agony,now she feels it wasn't her going wrong.It was you busy in your "own" life(no not "our"),good to see you happy that way.But if you feel this is called "stability" after being in love then i rather hate this stability.

The girl decided,from now onwards she would just be the way she has been ever..yes she was right,the transition she had in her life was a good way to run away from emotions,love and "expectations".Atleast it made her happy to see that she had no one to support,to be with her when she needed someone the most.In the end,she used to be a strong girl,she knew she was her own critic,her own supporter.As it is said,expectations leads to resentment and disappointment...This was true in her case too.

She wants things to go the way they are but without showing any sign of expectations.Just to see a HAPPY YOU and maybe a not so Tantrum throwing crazy girl of yours..!!

Still she loves him a lot and misses the way he was some months back!!!

From the dusty records..

This piece of poetry was developed by me and one of my friend way back in school for one of my favourite teacher at my coaching institute.So here it goes with some edited part....
Oh my highness …
Words are short to describe your fineness
But as the order comes straight
I am bound to create
This pretty pretty song
Hope you don’t get me wrong


Oh my highness…..
Thumping with his faint steps
Comes chemistry in depths
A chemistry who impresses with his smart walks
That everybody is indulged with his talks


Oh my highness……
Stylized with a low waist pair
Looks very cute with gelled hair
A typical iitian need for his eyes
With his glass rims as if  of a spy


Oh my highness……
With his inpiring words at bay
Everything seems like a child’s play
Time flies off like bird
Without anything weird


Oh my highness….
with your words befitted
Things go splendid
You made me feel easy
When I was queasy


Oh my highness
Let this beautiful chronology fold
i am always there as i told
Do reopen this song
So that  you can remember i am not wrong!!!

-lil miss sunshine

Only because i needed a monotonous break..

Hey my dear journal,
I know i have been so irregular out here.This took place not because i had nothing to write BUT because i could see life moving at a very fast pace.I wasn't able to pen down so many thoughts going on in my not-so-functional mind.Life has been a roller coaster since past one month for me.Here is how i would describe things:-




Firstly,20th September-happy birthday bhai!..it was a low-pitched family affair this time and i loved it undoubtedly.I don't know why but when it comes to birthday celebrations at home,i prefer being just with my mom,dad,grandparents and brother.Oopsy,couldn't click any snapshots this time.


********


Secondly,Exams!All i did was studying for my first exam,but everything turned upside down resulting in good scores in some other exams i had least expected for.I know,this has just been the starting of it all.I have to work harder and more harder.The next war to be fought from 31st..hope it goes well!


********


Ahan,this one has been one of my favourite happening,relatives showing up at your home.I am still cribbing for those delicious chocolates..yummy!!it was fantastic to see so many gifts at  a time..from chocolates to bracelets...to clothes..like the ball is in my court!The best of the lot was that 40 shades eye shade pack gifted to me by my cousin.I just gasped with surprise when i saw that,i guess my cousin know my likes and dislikes very well!:) :)


********


OK,now this has been the most beautiful happening of the whole.I wouldn't mention what actually it was but it has been the most special day of my life-28th September,2011.The one who knows the reason behind this day being special knows how nervousness did strike a day before that.Waiting and fidgeting at the metro station for 15 minutes was like the toughest job for me till date.All this was followed by a series of beautiful chronology which i guess is cant be described in words out here.Thank you for the one who made it special for me!


*********


Lastly,the ethereal bond which i shared with my chum once has rejuvenated.Things were cleared out,again facebook seems much more active now!




Above all might seem so mellifluous but it is not so.I thought that everything might go fine but some situations are just an impasse'.You just cant move out of it even when you try your best to mend it.There has been plethora of negative feelings circling my mind.I have been suffering from this imbroglio from past few days and i know it would cause a cloud burst soon,maybe today!I have been trying to become nonchalant and stay the way my closed one want me.But still,after giving it a thought i never want to lose wither my closed one or my friends at any cost.I just pray everything goes fine!




In addition to all this,now i can realize the value of some people.Yes,this last week has taught me how i cant live without some people now.Missing those people badly!:(


Though i had a loads of time to pen down my thoughts this week but the correct words just didn't come out and they still aren't.Maybe,my thoughts have a fear.Lately,my heart doesn't want anyone to know how i have been feeling,it wants to shun each and every flake of thought,maybe it is too shy,maybe it doesn't want to cry,maybe it doesn't want any sympathy,maybe it wants the world to show how strong it is and how ordinary a girl's life like me have without any worries around.


Sometimes i wished the human heart could be a quiescent organ,void of emotions.Only then will it be freed from anguish and despondency.


-lil miss sunshine




PS:forgot to mention the name of two legends who death have caused a great loss to humanity.Rest in peace Steve jobs and Tiger Pataudi.May their soul rest in peace.

The fear

It has been months now.Wrapped up in the same agony but a new war in my heart going on!

Are you the one?

You have been there when i lost all interest in love,affection and relationships.Do you remember our initial talks..i always told you how much i hate romantic songs and the romantic flicks? And the fact that i least cared for anyone except a bunch of friends and how much i hate communication on phone or messaging for hours after being such a professional(yes,typing without even looking at the keypad..lol!).Life was so much more of mess,though,still it is .But,that numbness which occupied my mind most of the time in respect of something sentimental has been eliminated.Yes,the way you hated me initially because i never responded properly every time you were angry at me(yeah the same reply-OK.i guess you are upset now,so talk to you later).All the time i wasted sitting in front of my lappy with that no-serious-life attitude!how insane i was!I lost all that sanity in life,all dreams,career,all that bothered was friendships and some college fun!You made me realize that life isn't about just having fun,being lazy,getting addicted to stuffs i shouldn't(though still i am but yes i do resist just because of that small promise!)

All this has turned around for better of course!:)

I still need a prick just to see whether is it all real?..can someone be in love( so much) with someone who isn't even paying a heed to him?If  i would have been at your place,i seriously would have lost it in a a month or so.But for you,it has been 8 damn months..oh man..such a long time..!i know the fear that creeps in your mind every time i go mad(yes my mood fluctuations,as you call it).I just want to tell you that its not my mood fluctuations,it is the fear whether would i be able to stick to my commitments?..are you the one?...do i really need someone?...and of course the fear of rejection after some time above all!


Though,things are still unexplainable.My dreams are still just a thin line of imagination.Some emotions are still unidentifiable but yeah there are some!there is something,which i am not able to figure out(if i would have been,you wouldn't have got numerous chances even after what i did with you twice or even thrice!).Surely,the way i imagined my life after something big happening(you know what i mean by big here),it isn't the same way.You surely aren't the one whom i ever dreamt of(yeah you are not my types :P)..we are poles apart starting from each and everything,you know that!(even the zodiac sign have never been compatible with me,a taurean..lol..i gave you loads of real life example for it!)..Still,something which is making things work is your love and care.Had you not been there,i wouldn't have thought of moving on,leaving the past.Had you not been there,i wouldn't have got the motivation to study when i was just losing everything.Had you not been there.i wouldn't have started listening to soft songs.Had you not been there,i wouldn't have that capabilities to talk on phone for hours.Had you not been there,i wouldn't have retain that care and affection for people.Had you not been there,i wouldn't be able to speak each and every activity happening around me each day..obviously who is interested in what all happened in my life each day!Had you not been there,i wouldn't have my best admirer(oh god,still remember how much anxious you were when i had a haircut,it didn't even bother me that much though they were my own hair) when it comes to looks and nature but the worst critic of all when it comes to my lifestyle(yeah the same laid back attitude i develop after a few days of seriousness..hehe..).Had you not been there,i wouldn't have given justifications(you know,not my habit to justify things).Had you not been there,i wouldn't have ever listen to someone scolding me(at least someone of my age) but in your case all i do is just listen to your scolding,then feel like a small child with a sorry face because of all her wrong deeds..but..seriously love the attention..lol!

Still,i don't speak my mind to you because i still need some time..something might not be right...maybe!All we can live is on hope.You will get your answers soon.

As for me...i do dream but i still have a fear...

Hoffnung..

HOFFNUNG...that's all i am thinking of at this very moment.I have never ever felt so miserable.I have always been an atheist but today when i look up at all the situations,all i could do is just pray to god.Just pray that everything fell at the right place.No,this ain't for me.These are prayers for a dear friend who is stuck in midst of the worst situation of all!

I have never seen you so distressed like i saw you yesterday.i want to come up to you,be with you all the times just to support you.Make you feel that everything would be alright.To make you realize that you are a WARRIOR.You have that potential in you(yes..the same potential i was speaking about on fone,you have it in you dude..undoubtedly).This really cant be the end.Even imagining such a thing makes me shiver.How would everything go after this?..No,i don't want to imagine it.

The way you talked on fone yesterday,i could make out how much miserable you were feeling.The dark clouds hovering over you is what i frigging badly want could be eliminated.I have never ever prayed or felt so miserable for someone other than me.But today,that's all i hope for you!

I want to see that smile back on your face.Your weird and lame talks back.Your lazy attitude(though it has to be improve) and your who-cares-about-the-world attitude back!I know neither is it in your hands,nor in mine but prayers do work sometimes.Don't just loose hope and don't just jump to any conclusions until you get the facts right.Even if everything doesn't fell right,do remember:this is not the end of everything,life is much more than all this.Its not about falling but rising up after falling down so deep.Nothing would be better that just rising up after a fall.Just believe in yourself,get more serious and a pinch of hard work:the ingredients to your success!

I feel like a storm passing by!:( :(

Best of luck for you dear friend.Its a crucial time for you.Don't just loose hope!Have faith in yourself and don't worry about family;they would be the first ones to support you against all odds!

PS:Readers,please do pray for my dear friend.I hope everything goes right for him!

ce shalll doit passer trop de..the story of a girl

I was just going through facebook and suddenly stalked you.Saw you,your posts,her face,her posts and comments.As i closed my eyes for a few seconds,everything got refreshed from where it all started.Not that i want that but because of the sudden impulse to check how you are doing in life.Maybe,that's not what i should have been doing,i do resent it because i know its not worth anymore.No,you don't worth me(that's what people say,you said when you were leaving).Still,from immemorial times(yeah that's what i would tag that time as..) i have been thinking about you,not that i haven't moved on.I still fall in love with people,i still laugh the way i want to,i still know how to care,i still know how to have fun but with you something was different.I don't know what ignited that spark in me to live life like i have the best of all,to be myself.I know you never loved me that way,never would you ever do so.I know you have been so busy nowadays,but i,do remember the time when you used to call me the closest person among all in your life.Just because of that little commitment of yours(even as a best friend),i still have some good memory in my head,I do feel like something missing,i will always remember you(obviously first love it was,my first love.) in a little place in the back of my mind.As if those feelings are saved in a small trunk and then throwing them in the large store room where my belongings which are not in use are put.


But wait,do you feel the same way?..even a little bit of it?


Guess what...its a big NO( i know that!).whom am i kidding now!.okay fine,REALITY CHECK..now the fact is:we all know why summer love(or first love) are called so..maybe because it doesn't last much,just a summer or maybe its just the first one,a starting of something beautiful or leaving something for a better thing!

Silly me,thinking about all such stuffs when i know you are nothing but a selfish.You are nothing but self obsessed.You have changed and so did i.

The worst part was,we dint even have to be together for you to shatter my heart.You did it as many times as you could stab someone until he sleeps to death.My heart bleeds but its time to move on.Move on for my own good(yes i am selfish,who isn't?). 

From now,don't expect me to remain in touch with you.I wouldn't do that deliberately.Moreover i m loathing you day by day because of your deeds.I am no Ceaser ready for all the stabs by his very close,Brutus.I wouldn't let it happen.

But,still i forgive you for all that happened,i miss you because you were the first who made my heart pound.But,i am moving on with my strong heart,this time all guarded.For good this time.:)

yours lovingly,
a girl all broken but still running strong!








ps:the above article has nothing to do with my personal life.So kindly take it just as a piece of writing or a thought.Hope you would be able to relate to a teenage girl's feeling.

I feel like writing for you just once a year...!

As i am finishing the second bournville chocolate,thinking of something to write for a person.Few gifted chocolates sugared with loads of love and money with promises that i would always be saccharine like i am today made me spill some affections on paper rather say on the laptop.So,this one goes just for you my baby brother(not-so-baby,but that's what i remember coz' of all the years of growing up together).

yes!this for you my dear sid!(no,siddi is what i call him)

I still remember the day when you were born,the mixed feeling i had at that.On one side i was so ecstatic when i learned that i would be having a sibling from this very day,but on the other i was regretting why isn't HE a SHE.Damn,i wanted a girl.A girl to play with me,sharing all those pretty barbie dolls i had.,to share each and every secrets of mine which you can share with your girl-friends,to go shopping together when we would have been old enough and try slipping into each others clothes.That's how i wanted things to happen.But then all these dreams were overpowered with the sudden blissful mood of the whole family including me of corse!

But..but that doesn't mean i love you a lot...i hate you so much...i hate so many things in you.I hate the way you watch all your violent cartoons all day long.I hate the way you dress up(ohh..how much i crib about this fact that you were so damn handsome but now as the day passes by,you are becoming more and more uglier..duh).I hate the way you put up your silly excuses in front of everyone in the family and succeed in all your tricks whereas i being the elder one always has to face the music.I hate the way you go mad about those multi-pocket jeans and cargoes(by the way on a serious note:you look like a joker in it).ahan...and not to forget your stupid love for yellow colour..duh...those yellow tees of yours.I hate the way you eat,i hate your madness to love each food stuff which i hate.I hate it when you pull my hair while fighting(ok readers just to tell you now, i do revert back,i do bite him until and unless he bleed).I hate you for ruining each of my plan.I hate the mornings which usually start with a fight to occupy the same bathrooms for one whole hour inspite of of having 2 more in the house.I hate the way you have occupied the whole cupboard though you don't even need half if it.I just don't like your almost regular rude behaviour even if i am in a jolly good mood. You just turn into a moron when it comes to watch stuffs on idiot box.i know how much you try to irritate me by switching to channels which i don't like(though i know even you don't).You have a  bad taste in everything starting from food to clothes.I even hate the way you switch off the lights as early as possible so that i cant do any work in the night and the way you have planned out to throw me out of your room.But remember i HATE  your ugly funny room and would be shifting back to my room...ha ha ha!!I even hate the way you talk on phone(it looks like self improvising for you:to  be as rude as possible).I even hate the way you go on with you stupid games(especially farmville),those stupid cartoons,your madness about rajma and tindas,your electronic stuffs(which you don't even let anyone touch) and your i-know-everything attitude.I hate the way you copy each and every innovative idea of mine,you cheater cock.The worst of all how you forget everything including your friends' name and the way you don't obey my orders.I hate everything about you.

I am still recalling all the fights we had on stuffs like that.But as it is said,you get into regular fights with only those people whom you love a lot.Maybe the same prevails here.I do think so coz' the more you know a person inside out(the real person),the more you know his bad and good side.Everyone has a good side and bad one,nobody is perfect ,nobody have the same qualities and nobody can follow your steps the way you wish,if that person does then you might call him more of a slave.

In our case,i know how much we hate each others qualities but still love being with each other,accepting each other rather say adjusting or in our words 'tolerating' each other.But maybe that what we call affection and love;being with someone knowing each and every bad quality of that person.

I did mention above all the points i hate about out you but when it comes to the other side of the coin.I love you for being the most lovable brother(on some rare occasions though),being the most funny creature when i m literally in tears(for some reason where you are not involved),for guiding me through stuffs where i have a zero-knowledge(yeah yeah..i know ..the electronics stuff...now don't boast much about it).I love it when we get united and fight with everyone in the house to prove we are right or convincing them.All the laughters we had together on senseless topics,all the times we fight for chocolates(dekh aadhi aadhi krle chup chap),abusing at most at each other,pretending we do not care;these are the moments which i cherish a lot.we need enough space for scribbling such stuffs but still i love fighting with you and i know even you need a reaction from me(that personal attention which you gain though your fights and arguments).I love it.These being the crazy moments which proves the love,when it comes to a more serious note,i still remember how you used to go sick everytime i used to go on school trips for some days when you were small(and even cry!).But bro,this is not just from one end,even i miss you a lot..a lot when you are not at home for more than a day(remember the solan trip of yours??..man i missed you a lot though never told you.).I love the way you get concerned about me.The way you used to bring everything you eat to me just share it with me.All the love is reflected in each and every actions of yours.

So today's article is just dedicated for you(hope you would read it).I LOVE YOU BROTHER AND WILL ALWAYS BE WITH YOU.

By the way here are some of our sweet memories i collected-

                                                                ain't he beautiful?

 

 sundays  are meant for such silly photo shoots!!

In the end,just want to say bhai i love you so much but this is the only day when i feel like writing something(no no..no buttering for money)

May god bless you and may you remain the same cry-baby,lazy,shabby lil old boy as always!!:)

oh by the way forgot to mention......HAPPY RAKSHA BANDHAN!!

yours lovingly,

your bitch sister(as you tag me)

tHe RaInBoW tHeOrY!

Yes,you are right the title seems quite familiar.I still have that copy of ht city article written by Genelia D'Souza with the same title as above.ain't it amusing??.Well coming back to Genelia's article which i personally loved reading,relates colours and the way they influence a person's mood.It is absolutely true and fascinating to see how colours can pep you up take you down.

Well,coming back to my own blog,i was just going through a book(take it as an anonymous book for the time being) and was amused to see how colours can be related to literary works of famous poets and writers.Moreover,there is some deep meaning buried deep inside those lines which i loved reading.It tells us what exactly each colour signifies.So,here is a list of such work:

(starting with violet)..

• I think it makes god angry if you walk by the colour violet in a field somewhere and don't notice it.
• I never get tired of the blue sky.
• I love the sea's sounds and the way it reflects the sky,colours that shimmer across its surface are unbelievable.
• God has a brown voice.
• The colour of truth is gray.
• Much have i travelled in the realms of gold.And many godly states and kingdoms seen..
• There are painters who transforms the sun into a yellow spot but there are the others who,thanks to their art and intelligence,transform a yellow spot into the sun.
• The very pink of perfection..
• Its amazing how it cheers one to shred oranges.
• Red has guts:deep,strong,dramatic.
• The winds will blow their own freshness into you and the storms their energy while cares will drop off like autumn leaves.

Interesting to know nay,how close these lines describes each colour and with that also remaining in touch with nature.It feels like heaven when i imagine these line with my eyes closed and remembering the colour associated with it.Beautiful feeling it is.

Lastly,i would like to say:guys,lets its important to let all those colours out.Never shy away from being coloured.its beautiful!Being coloured is not just a sign of vitality but tells even what sets every nation apart yet united.

Mere colour,unspoiled by meaning and unallied with definite form,can speak to the soul in a thousand different ways.

-Oscar Wilde

lil miss sunshine,

PS

  






ps:the anonymous book mentioned above is none other than an Asian Paints sample book..haha..!I was just going through it and found this nice idea of posting such article.I loved the way every colour is being presented.I guess everybody loves colours who lives in black and white?

Boast of Quietness

Two years back while navigating through various books in the non-fiction section of my school library,i came across this famous book the inheritance of loss by Kiran Desai.Call it my "crush" on books and my amour for novel-reading which made me open this book.I couldn't read it for sure BUT something in it grabbed my attention while flipping through the initial pages of that book.It was like a cherry on the top of my favourite chocolate truffle cake,indeed it was;an inspirational poem!When i initially started reading it,i started realising that it was not meant to be my piece of cake and my ardor started fainting.But still i didn't lose hope,re-read it and got to know the exact meaning of the poetic verses.It is one of the most beautiful and inspirational poem from all that i have read.Moreover,i loved the way the poet played with the words and the metaphors he used.Hence,i would like to share this piece of poetry on my blog!


Writings of light assault the darkness, more prodigious than meteors.
The tall unknowable city takes over the countryside.
Sure of my life and my death, I observe the ambitious and would like to understand them.
Their day is greedy as a lariat in the air.
Their night is a rest from the rage within steel, quick to attack.
They speak of humanity.
My humanity is in feeling we are all voices of the same poverty.
They speak of homeland.
My homeland is the rhythm of a guitar, a few portraits, an old sword,
the willow grove’s visible prayer as evening falls.
Time is living me.
More silent than my shadow, I pass through the loftily covetous multitude.
They are indispensable, singular, worthy of tomorrow.
My name is someone and anyone.
I walk slowly, like one who comes from so far away he doesn’t expect to arrive.
-Jorge Luis Borges


Hope u liked it!
Now its time for some sleep though i am still still texting and making people go mad with my wierd sense of humor.Still,i want to wish my dear journal.
good night!take care!
lil miss sunshine




ps:a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY to one of my dearest friend..hope he would like my creation after getting bugged for two hours and actually feeling like pulling my hair and ripping them apart while sitting in front of my lappy!

Just not into it!

Just came across my movies collection and found one of the cute,light romantic heath ledger flick:"10 things i hate about you".The first thing that reminds me of this movie is the girl shrew girl,Kat Stratford.But somehow she delivers me as a character who is the most mawkish yet the strongest of all.Ok, now without going in to details i would like to share a few lines which i have always loved to listen and read from that movie.I know its every girl's dream to speak these lines but alas its a movie.


"I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair.
 I hate the way you drive my car, I hate it when you stare.
 I hate your big, dumb combat boots and the way you read my mind.
 I hate you so much it makes me sick — It even makes me rhyme.
 I hate the way you're always right. I hate it when you lie.
 I hate it when you make me laugh — Even worse when you make me cry.
 I hate it when you're not around. And the fact that you didn't call.
 But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you — Not even close, not even a little  bit, not even at all"

with love,
lil miss sunshine
ps: I don't have any kind of  strings attached to it.As people say my heart is frigid and love is not my piece of cake.Well,thanks guys for letting me remember that i am just not into it!

Another month...another year!!

Our inside jokes-too many to name.
When we're apart it's never the same.
When we're together it's nothing but fun.
Replacing my girls just can't be done.
As the years pass,
and we grow apart.
I want you to know,
that you guys are in my heart.
You helped me through problems,
through things good and bad.
You helped me keep smiling :-),
when I was sad.
You helped me with guys,
you made me stay strong.
How will I live,
when you guys are gone?
And where the years take us,
no place is too far.
We will think of each other,
wherever we are.
You're wonderful people,
with good hearts to lend.
And I want you to know,
that ya'll will always be my Best Friends !!!!

Emotions,love and friendships all these seems so interconnected now.I have realised that love doesn't binds you to one person,it doesn't bind you just to your kin.There is a relation which is beyond all this..where you need not say that i love you but still know that the opposite person feel the same way.Its not about flattering some one but just telling the truth whether its the most pathetic one or the best one!


I feel blessed to have such gang of mine-MY GIRLS GANG!!!I never ever imagined after going through a phase where i always had some or the other conflict with such a girls gang,that i could ever imagine myself at a place like that.


I love them for just being what they are,the way they love me,the way they care about every small things happening in my life,being the shoulder to cry on,being my laugh,being my support through thick and thin.Starting from doing assignments to listening to my deepest and darkest secrets,they had it all and still are.

I realised it now that how much fun i have with them,that i even forgot being happy (or rather say interested in his talks)with someone who was meant to be the most important person in my life at a time.Everyone changes,so did i and that's what made the difference.I am obliged to have such friends who did every smallest thing to make me come out of that platform i was stuck in.


Messages saved from around past 2 years deleted.The most special snaps deleted.

Hell yeah,i did feel something.Something just hit hard on me and voices screaming all over my mind:"how can you do this,that's the only thing you have to cherish upon.".But i guess that's the power of friendship;holding back and resisting even when you know you cant, but just because your friends said that.And the "trust" you have in them makes u want to take that as an un-objectionable order!!


A day ago while chatting with one of my most closest friend,i realised that everyone is cribbing about the same fact-COLLEGE LIFE,FRIENDSHIPS,CRUEL LIFE BEHIND IT....!!And then i realised i am at a much better position than anyone else from my school gang.I had it all,and still felt like i have nothing.I wanted these 2-3 years to pass as soon as possible BUT now i feel the cardinal need.


From past 2 years,i went through what i would call the REAL WORLD....starting from a large group to just limiting myself to three of my girlfriends...from celebrating break-up parties to crying together for the same...checking out each and every hot guy and then passing comments when he is passing by(ok..now a matter of certitude:even if u want to hide about the fact that u have hots on a college guy,you just cant because these people;whom i call my bitches would never let it happen..duh)..our dreams which would never ever come true...a big RULE-BOOK to find the "perfect" guy for ourselves...discussing about our dream dates...planning about buying similar black tees..making fun of each other every day(as every bitch have its own day!)..passing the most pathetic comments when any of us make a fashion faux pas to complimenting after every hour how beautiful any of us look in a particular dress or hairstyle..making as many excuses possible to remain together even if its a college holiday..just dancing without any hesitation at any damn song...trying to stick together whatsoever may happen..finding solution for every damn problem any of us have..helping out even if its 4 in the night..planning out shopping together(which actually hasn't been possible with all of us together till now)..cogitating about whats right and whats wrong for any of us...surprises...theme parties..boozing...eating chicken on Tuesdays when u haven't even tried it once...sheesha lounges..planning Agra trips..trying something adventurous every time just for that adrenaline rush...the BURN BOOK of ours to that Gothic room we discovered together..our most weird talks to our inside jokes(not to forget the stupid NV jokes)!!!everything..everything is so so new to all of us..and i guess this in not the end,there is more to come..as i would describe it in a few lines:


Another tear,another joy..
Another month,another year...
But this is not the end..
we have more to start with...


May all of you stay blessed and may our friendship reach at a height from where none of us can jump or come down ever!

love you guys
~your PS(yes,lil miss sunshine it is)




ps:

a quick short story...

Speak now....

From few weeks,i was waffling over a question and in the end decided to share it with everyone.

Maybe someone would come up with an answer!!!

A few weeks ago,i was randomly switching over channels on my idiot box.Suddenly,i came through this repeat telecast of  koffee with karan with Shahrukh Khan invited over for chat.Atlast,this ceased my habit of flipping over channels endlessly for some time.(It rarely happens when the remote is in my hands).

While watching it i realised that it was going to be one of the best dewy eyed and captivating piece of interview of the season.Many of my friends were in deep respect for him from then.But somehow,i felt some of his concepts quite shallow!Not that i abhor SRK,i love his talent on screen!!On the show he was asked by karan johar whether people misinterpret him due to lack of communication.To this he replied-"Yes,that do  happen with me due to which i usually end up with broken friendships.But,i feel that if you love somebody and care for then,you don't need to say it.You just love them.You don't need to tell them every time that,hey..I LOVE YOU...hello(on picking up phone)..I LOVE YOU..I CARE FOR YOU.you don't have to say i love u.....even in my movies i have a big issue saying mei tumse mohhbat krta hun..agar krte ho toh kehne ki zarurt nahi hoti,agar pad gyi toh mohhbat nhi hai!!"


Whereas,a few days ago i was watching a famous chick flick,My best friend's wedding.While watching ,i came over an interesting and precisely ironical(to the above situation) dialogue said by the one of the protagonist in the movie(the male counterpart of Julia Roberts) which caught my attention.This guy was talking to his best friend(Julia Roberts,who started to realise that she was in love with him when he told about his plans on marrying some other girl).He said-"..if you love someone,you say it,you say it right there,out loud.Otherwise the moment just passes you by..."


Now,personally speaking i agree with the latter part.As far as i think about it,i would choose to say it loudly to one and all that i love them,be it my friends,my family or the love of my life.I wonder why do people just don't let out things even if they feel so.I have friends who have a lot more to say,to show affection,to show care but they just don't ,pretending that they hardly care or they hardly feel anything.But they fail to understand that it causes a dilemma for the opposite person(i have been a victim of it quite a lot of times).They leave the other person in imbroglio whether their love is reciprocated in the same manner as they do or not.I am not asking people to love the same way as they get BUT atleast some(even a small amount of it)kind of affection is always expected.As it is always said,no relation can ever work if its just one sided!!!Moreover,i have even seen people showing up no care and affection just because they want the opposite person to get a hint himself.But seriously guys,it doesn't happen..not even a minutest bit of it.Nowadays,when you would see people showing affection just coz' of their own personal benefit,you cant easily recognize the friends and foes among them,so you need to speak up,speak now.Moreover it makes the other person feel so happy about the fact that yes they are blessed;they have people around them who love them for whatever they are!!So guys just buck up..just show everyone how much you care for them!!!


As far as i am concerned,i would do anything..anything..(millionth of times) ..to show my loved ones that i care..i love them.Maybe it would be my words which would be the most helpful tool to communicate the love to them.But as far i as i know myself,i know i am damn expressive.If i care,i will show it.If i am angry.i would show that too.Moreover when it comes to the other shore of communication,i gave a lot of thought to it and is sick of always being the one who has to make the effort,from now on if i can't be met half away then they can drop away.i am just so much pissed off of this "unrequited love".So.....
"If u luv me, say it. If u trust me, do it. If u want me, show it. If u need me, prove it"

And now for you my dear friends,just don't think..ACT...SPEAK NOW and spread smiles everyone around you by your words!!!:) :)

FIRE AWAY!!!


Au revoir
~~lil miss sunshine,PS

THE SILENT DEATH

Silently...
i am leaving myself

prowling towards the miserable end

that too without any helping hand.

The path to my end is very long

but now,it seems to be a sad song.

I know,i have to go away one day

then why not today??

I know,i have to go away from this world

the way i stepped in it & was curled.

Its now time & i know that i have to go away

from this beautiful world to my way.

Many people to care for me

but still something missing in me.

Maybe they do best they can,

but cant understand agony in which i swan.

I cant survive in the materialistic world,

with lots of wits &puffs that swirled.

I cant live to someone's expectations

thus,i think death is better explnation.

Its now time to make a change

just relax & calculate the range.

I know,i can escape it,there's a way

and i know that i have to go away.

With so many personal grudges,

god must be the better judge.

Give me sentence to death  

for all i had kept.

Tears trickling down my cheeks

but these are characterstics of a meek.

My situation is getting dual,

i may not get anything usual.

O god!!mercy on me

grant me an easy death.

May i lay on my bed,

and silently......these eyes rest!!!

~LIL MISS SUNSHINE,PS

those were the days....

So here i am again.It has been so many days since i wrote though i am working upon my ongoing article till then i thought to write some good poetic stuff on my blog.Hence just searched around for few of my creations and got a really good piece which is so much close to my heart.Its value increases because this was my first poem and secondly this poem holds a special meaning!!!Its all about my school life.But But before i  write,i would like to say that this is not a very well versed or written poem(just a beginner poem)in fact its just my emotions at that time which were given vent by the pen in my hand!!:)...so pardon me if you think things are not rhyming or words are out of place...here it goes~~~

Those morning alarms,
agitated sleepy eyes;
that mumma's shout,
to get ready for school;
the morning marathon race,
for catching the bus.

Those morning assemblies,
with fagged out faces;
That jam-packed corridor
with high spirits n souls;
The long continuouss bells
with excitement to peep out.


Those bunking sessions,
and the mixture of fear n excitement;
that short lunch break,
empty boxes n raveneous faces;
the gorilla wars on a
vividly decorated lunchbox.

That two mins water break,
bunch of empty bottles;
promises of coming back on time
requesting gullible faces;
my partners of crime,
becoming stars of the day.

Last desk assignment completions,
nodding to the lectures on front;
those high-pitched cat fights,
all eyes glaring and laughing;
the lovely never endin crushes
and the blushing red cheeks.

Those words of consolation
for the broken hearts;
those endless days
coming to an end;
that sweaty afternoon,
with many handshakes.

The promises made,

to come again tomorrow;

with a new shine on face;
with a new story to recite;
with fresh assignments to be scribbled.
those were the memories....
of  my Alma mater!!!!

Yhose blossoming days,
that spring season of my life.
those were the best days,
of my life.
those golden days,
those were the days.......

~lil miss sunshine,PS

A Beginning...

Here i am just in the middle of the night and i was just doing some editing stuffs to some of my photographs so that i can post them on facebook.Suddenly i got an idea to have my own blog,so i started collecting each & every single tip to be a good blogger.Hence,this is my first post on my blog.I hope it goes well.I just didnt start it because its kind of  a trend these days.I lovee to write but still feel that there is lot improvment i have to make when it comes to writing.Moreover its not just about writing your own stuff,it also means to stay connected to the world,to layout my own opinions about some topics and to read some intellectual,knowledgeable,brainy posts by people.This surely the best way to remain connected by the happenings all over the world!

So i hope it goes on well though i started my blog on very small note but as it quoted by someone-"From small beginning comes great things"

On this inspirational quote i would like to wrap up my first post on my first blog or rather say "An Introduction".

In the end i would like to quote-"     A journey of thousand miles must begin with a single step"
:) :)

with love
lil miss sunshine